What makes a bad movie unforgettable? What gives a movie its “so bad it’s good” quality? Here’s what qualifies a movie for inclusion on BadMovieBlog.com…

Naturally, the more of the following things that feature in a bad movie, the better.

• A low budget
• Bad acting
• Exploitation
• Stupid plots
• Unnecessary nudity
• Giant animals
• Zombies
• Strippers
• Zombie strippers
• Gore
• Martial arts
• Vanity projects
• Use of pre-existing fictional characters

A Low Budget
It’s easy to take a shot at a movie just because it has a low budget. So this isn’t just about dollar bills, it’s about how the producers use the money they have. For example, Kevin Smith’s modern classic “Clerks” was filmed for less than $30,000, most of which was spent on securing rights for songs on the soundtrack. For a modern equivalent of four times that budget, Harold P. Warren created “Manos: The Hands of Fate“. A low budget doesn’t necessarily make a movie bad, just as a big budget doesn’t make a movie a good one. But film producers will usually get what they pay for.

This category of “Low Budget” covers everything that low budgets lead to – bad makeup, flimsy sets, poor direction, bad lighting, stock footage, bad over-dubs and more!

Bad Acting
Following on from “low budgets” comes “bad acting”. Naturally, if you pay peanuts, you’re not going to get actors for your cast. Whether the acting is intentionally bad or not, bad acting undermines any seriousness the plot itself holds.

Exploitation
Exploitation films are never good movies because they’re not about winning Oscars, but are about exploiting an audience, funnily enough. With set-pieces and shock value paramount, plots and artistic merit go right out of the window.

Stupid Plots
Large plotholes, stupid endings, ridiculous storylines, unexpected twists, expected twists. Anything that forces you to extend your disbelief a bit further than you’re used to.

Unnecessary Nudity
So the leading lady has just had a hard day fighting off zombies/serial killers/rapists/midgets and can unwind in only one way – a shower scene that does nothing whatsoever for the plot.

Oh, I haven’t seen these people before. Why are they introducing even more characters at this point in the movie? This glamour photographer does nothing to move the plot forward, but at least his subject is easy on the eye. And naked.

Giant Animals
Giant animals rule. It doesn’t matter how they got to be that big, we’ll let flawed movie science explain that. The more, the merrier – just look at “Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus“. Multiple animals in combat with each other. Nice.

Zombies
They’re back from the dead. They want brains. They’re easily out-smarted. Be careful though! The modern breed could rival Olympic sprinters! Head for cover!

Strippers
See “Unnecessary Nudity“.

Zombie Strippers
The Gin & Tonic of bad movies.

Gore
Blood gushing everywhere, open wounds, cheap special effects. Sometimes only the strong-stomached can stand celluloid splatter. Violent attacks and kitchen appliance self-defence – killing people in graphic, bloody and violent ways wins our vote!

Martial Arts
Bruce Lee was the seminal movie martial artist. Dozens of people known as “Bruce Li” are the seminal bad movie martial artists. Ridiculous stories including lots of dead fathers, old men with long white beards, pseudo-magical powers. I’ve not even got around to awful dubbing yet! Even better is when you see a movie that isn’t in the genre use Kung Fu’s clichés for its storylines and fights.

Vanity Projects
By this, I mean a film where the leading actor also has a role behind the camera. In order of most to least vain jobs to have in addition to being a leading actor, here’s a list:

1. Screenwriter – give yourself the best lines
2. Director – give yourself lots of closeups
3. Producer – be a control freak and be the movie’s boss
4. Executive Producer – do nothing extra but get more money

The best example of a bad movie vanity project has to be “Manos“. Hal Warren wrote, directed, produced and starred despite having no experience of the motion picture industry.

Use of Pre-existing Fictional Characters
“Santa Claus Conquers the Martians“. Need I say more?